- Will officially be considered a fetus by the end of this week.
- Is over an inch long, maybe by as much as 3/4 of ANOTHER WHOLE INCH. That’s almost TWO INCHES.
- That’s about the size of a…hmm…*glances frantically around room*…okay, it’s slightly bigger than a really big coat button, but not quite as long as a AA battery. There.
- Has a heartbeat strong enough to be heard via a Doppler.
- Most congenital conditions appear before the end of week 10, meaning the most delicate and critical development period is over. You can breathe a sigh of relief over that, but…uh, I wouldn’t go celebrate the milestone with a bathtub of gin, or anything.
- Might be starting to feel just the teensiest bit better, symptom-wise. Morning sickness “typically” peaks around week nine, but you have my permission to tell me to shove that “typical” business up my ass.
- Just like I just flipped the double bird at my copy of Your Pregnancy Week by Week for telling me that I don’t need maternity clothes yet. Look, my bump may be 75% methane gas at this point, but that doesn’t mean my gasbaby should be made to suffer constricting waistbands.
- New bras might be a good idea, as I recently discovered after seeing a photo of myself taken by someone else and oh look! Armpit boobs!
Congratulations! You’ve made it to the double-digits. The final weeks of the first trimester will slowly tick by but then ta-da! Second Trimester.
Is anyone here a little…emotional? About…anything? And everything? While I have always been prone to a little teary-up-ness during movies and soft-focus commercials, I become a blubbery emo HOT MESS when I’m pregnant.
Last time, before I even knew I was pregnant, I sat on the couch and sobbed sobbed sobbed during 13 Going On 30, completely helpless to do anything about it even after Jason walked in to find me raccoon-eyed and shaking, blabbering on and on about something about a dollhouse before he finally turned around and silently left the room.
This time I had similarly proud moments during The Ghost Whisper (TELL MY DAUGHTER I’M SO PROUD OF HER!), HBO’s John Adams (SMALLPOX!), Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day(WE’RE SEEING A MOVIE IN THE THEATER AND I’M JUST SO HAPPY ABOUT IT!), and about a zillion times during the day when I am alone and able to indulge my shameful habit of seeking out sad news stories about babies on the Internet so I may shed hot tears and weep and then chase Noah around demanding hugs to make Mama happy again.
I am a sick, sick person.